When your success is a threat to other women .. (the visibility block nobody talks about)

We were friends .. until I won.

🏆 In 2017, I entered the Bodybuilding.com Spokesmodel Search.I wasn’t a big fitness influencer or anything. I was literally just a girl with 300 followers who decided to throw her hat in the ring.. with women I'd been looking up to online, for years. 👀

It was a dream come true for me.

Traveling, creating content, and competing with these girls who had been my Youtube inspirations.And over the 3 months during the Spokesmodel Search, we became friends

Or at least, I thought we did.

The evening I won the competition I was walking through our hotel lobby and saw one of these new “friends” I had gotten close with.

I waved to her.

Called out her name.

And she walked right past me, like I didn’t exist.

I was genuinely shocked.

The others weren’t as directly cold, but I could 100% feel the dynamic shift.

The texts slowed down. The connection faded. The friendliness disappeared.

And I don’t think I realized until recently, how much that moment has stuck with me.

Like a subconscious rule.. that's been influencing all the little decisions I make in an average workday. Capping how visible I allow myself to be. How big I allow myself to celebrate.

“If I go all the way… I might lose people.”

Be chosen? .. and the women in your world will leave.

Be celebrated? ..and they'll likely turn their backs.

Win publicly? ..and suddenly you are not as easy to like anymore.

🎭 🫠 🪦

Yeah, we can say #womensupportingwomen all we want. Blame the patriarchy. Whateverthefuck.

But the reality is, situations like this are GOING to fucking happen on your way to the top.

Genuinely I think most of our "visibility blocks" are not about posting more, or saying the spicier thing.

It's about trying to protect yourself, from the cost of becoming well-known. Being talked about in rooms you're not in.

Becoming the woman other women compare themselves to, project onto, copy, judge, distance themselves from, or silently decide is “too much.”

Because posting content is one thing.

Succeeding so fast that you impossible to ignore..?

That's when people start seeing you as the villian of their story.

And when your body has learned that success, visibility, or bigness might get you cast out of "the group"?

It will continue quietly capping every move you make in your business, to prevent you from looking like a threat to the women around you.

You’ll write a post speaking to that elevated ideal client.. but water it down at the last second, bc you're worried that 1 client will get offended/hurt.

You’ll tell yourself you’re finally ready to share your new offer.. then decide you need to refine the sales page just 1x more (aka delay selling).

You’ll sell the offer on IG stories.. but at the last second, try to apply it to literally everyone who has watched your story for that day.

Tiny 6-second micro decisions that are so subtle, you don't even clock them during a workday.. but that change the trajectory of your business. Define the glass ceiling you hit up against, year after year, no matter what strategy you try.